And so I've done it: I've created a blog.
"She did what she could." That's Mark 14:8, NIV, about the woman who pours perfume over Jesus' feet. In searching for a name for this (possibly ill-conceived) blog, I opened up an old diary filled with quotes I collected over the span of a few years, maybe a decade ago, and found the verse scribbled among lines taken from Madeleine L'Engle non-fiction. I can't imagine what significance it would have had to me, then, probably in college, maintaining my status-quo faith while still enjoying "college life," however tamed-down my version was.
I know it what it means now, though, "doing what I can." It means setting aside my perfectionist tendencies to allow for crumbs under the high chair, too-short pants on my skinny toddler, that mascara smudge under my left eye. It means grace (given by self, for self) for months-late thank-you cards, hiding the board book I can't stand to read again, opting for a bite of sugar-energy when there are freshly-cut carrot sticks in the fridge. Occasionally, it even means saying "no."
Recently I described to a friend my surprise at my new laid-back view of life. "This is just how it is now," I said, referring to the endless days of toddler battles and infant feedings. "Sometimes it's not good or bad, it just is." And so I do what I can with what I have, and choose to let the rest go. (For the record, my toddler is not often a fight, and my infant does not nurse constantly.)
But there are also some things that "doing what I can" is not. It is not an excuse never to sweep the kitchen floor or finish the thank-you cards, or to live on brownies. It is not justification for abdicating my roles and going out for coffee (which I don't drink anyway, and for which there is an acceptable time), because I feel that I've given all that I can. It is not a defensive remark, claiming that whatever I have offered must be enough -- because, in fact, there is often the opportunity for stretching, for learning how to ask for help, for depending on a husband or a mother or the Lord to enable me to do more than I can (alone).
Grace AND growth.
Commentary from my current Bible study on Isaiah (chapter 40 last week) reminds me that "He has made sufficient provision to enable [me] to bring Him honor, which is [my] chief aim and greatest good." And so I do what I can with what I have -- with what he has given me, no more and no less -- and I do it to his glory, and to my good. And it is enough.
There's only one brownie left. Perhaps I'll eat it while I sweep the kitchen floor.
"She did what she could." That's Mark 14:8, NIV, about the woman who pours perfume over Jesus' feet. In searching for a name for this (possibly ill-conceived) blog, I opened up an old diary filled with quotes I collected over the span of a few years, maybe a decade ago, and found the verse scribbled among lines taken from Madeleine L'Engle non-fiction. I can't imagine what significance it would have had to me, then, probably in college, maintaining my status-quo faith while still enjoying "college life," however tamed-down my version was.
I know it what it means now, though, "doing what I can." It means setting aside my perfectionist tendencies to allow for crumbs under the high chair, too-short pants on my skinny toddler, that mascara smudge under my left eye. It means grace (given by self, for self) for months-late thank-you cards, hiding the board book I can't stand to read again, opting for a bite of sugar-energy when there are freshly-cut carrot sticks in the fridge. Occasionally, it even means saying "no."
Recently I described to a friend my surprise at my new laid-back view of life. "This is just how it is now," I said, referring to the endless days of toddler battles and infant feedings. "Sometimes it's not good or bad, it just is." And so I do what I can with what I have, and choose to let the rest go. (For the record, my toddler is not often a fight, and my infant does not nurse constantly.)
But there are also some things that "doing what I can" is not. It is not an excuse never to sweep the kitchen floor or finish the thank-you cards, or to live on brownies. It is not justification for abdicating my roles and going out for coffee (which I don't drink anyway, and for which there is an acceptable time), because I feel that I've given all that I can. It is not a defensive remark, claiming that whatever I have offered must be enough -- because, in fact, there is often the opportunity for stretching, for learning how to ask for help, for depending on a husband or a mother or the Lord to enable me to do more than I can (alone).
Grace AND growth.
Commentary from my current Bible study on Isaiah (chapter 40 last week) reminds me that "He has made sufficient provision to enable [me] to bring Him honor, which is [my] chief aim and greatest good." And so I do what I can with what I have -- with what he has given me, no more and no less -- and I do it to his glory, and to my good. And it is enough.
There's only one brownie left. Perhaps I'll eat it while I sweep the kitchen floor.
Yay! You took the plunge! I'll add you to my blogs!
ReplyDeletevery good attitude :) It goes along with being content with what you have, too, which many of us struggle with
ReplyDeleteYou did it! Great name and a great first post.
ReplyDeleteWords to ponder and challenge . . .
ReplyDelete